Sleepless

People tend to ask me what scares me the most and are always surprised at my answers. They probably expected answers like spiders, ghosts etc, but no, that’s not what scares me.
What I’m scared most of is not someone falling out of love with me, I think it’s inevitable, I'm not scared of being looked at one day and deciding I'm not good enough, I probably never was, I'm not scared of hate; no! 
I'm scared of starting afresh, i truly am. I am scared of baring myself open to someone else again because it didn't work out the other time. I am honestly scared of trying again on the possibility of this could be it. I’m scared that I'd make the same mistake or get hurt all over again, I'm scared of a pattern, fall in love with me, then decide I'm no longer what you want, and u fall out of love with me, letting go, just like that. I don’t know how people survive this, but it scares me to my bones. 
And it's what keeps me up at night. 

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